Top
 

 
Home Shop Portraits  
 

 
../Monologues
header
 

THE LIGHT THAT ALMOST FAILED
by
Monty Wells


Did you ever hear that story
Of a dark and stormy night
When the famous Eddystone lighthouse
Failed to show a light?

Technicians, electricians,
They came from all about
To try to find the reason why
The beacon light went out

But these bright boys were baffled
They hadn't got a clue
'Til one bright 'sparks' apprentice said
"I'll tell you what to do...

Beneath the Menai Bridge, they say
On Anglesey's fair shore
There's lived an old Dutch hermit, Hans,
For sixty years or more.

His thinking power's marvellous
His reasoning is great
They say he once told someone
Why railway trains run late!"

A messenger was sent forthwith
To find the brainy sage
And brought him back within a day
Despite the old blokes age.

They told old Hans the problem
Then stood back beneath his spell
They watched the old goat scratch his head
And scratch his bum as well

He cast his eyes around the room
Along the floor and wall
Then ambled to a corner
To a meter black and small

He studied it intently
And then produced a bob
He put it in a little slot
And turned a little knob

And lo! The Eddystone light shone forth
Old Hans had used his brains
The hermit from the Menai Bridge
Had saved the shipping lanes

He said "Should this occur again
My duty I'll not shirk
Give me a call and you will find
Menai Hans will make light work!"

 
Back to Menu
 
Seaside Postcards Shop Portraits  
 
Top
laugh
divider
 
Return to
' HALL OF FAME '
Menu
 
divider
 
Old Favourites
More Old Favourites
The Tradition Continues
First Ladies
Celebrity Reciters
Tall Stories
The Military
Seafaring Yarns
Railway Tales
A Sporting Life
Parodies
Anonymous
Almost Shakespeare
Albert Lives On
Public Information
Visitors' Submissions

A More Serious Note
Childhood Favourites
 
divider
 
laugh
Bottom