|THE HAPPY MORMAN MAN|
In a ladies school in Utah lived a gay and festive tutor
Who fell in love with all the girls
And he loved them in such numbers that they very nearly spoilt his slumbers
For he had scores of different pearls
He had sixteen one and onlys and he loved them by their lonelys
To marry all of them he pined
While his sweethearts slumbered lightly on this tho't he pondered nightly
Until he very nearly lost his mind.
Chorus: There was Maisy, Daisy, they very nearly sent him crazy
For he had so many girls
Most men are seen with just one queen but this one had sixteen
He said, 'Pray dearest May, would you like to run away?
An elopement we will plan
And a break we will make to the old Salt Lake
And I'll be a happy Morman man
Yes a happy happy Morman man
So when everyone was sleeping, this young tutor came a-creeping
In a manner that he'd ne'er crept before
He had nearly every carriage in the town hired for the marriage
He had trunks and bags and boxes by the score
Now this amorous young chappy was quite sure that he'd be happy
Every trouble, trial, and problem he foresaw
But one thing he had neglected, for he never had suspected
That he would have sixteen mother-in-law.
Chorus: There was Anny, fanny, most every nook and cranny
Of his heart was filled with girl
Most men are true to one or two but he loved quite a few
He led Anne by the hand when he married all the band
On the installment plan
And they go to and fro like a beauty show
So ain't he a happy Morman man
Yes, a happy happy Morman man.