by Joyce Grenfell
Children, we've had our run around the classroom, and now it's time to start our day's work. We're going to have a sing-song together, and Miss Boulting is going to play for us, so come and settle down over here, please. Kenny, why haven't you taken your coat off? No, it isn't time to go home yet, Kenny! You've only just come. You'd rather go home? Bad luck. No, you can't go, not quite yet. Kenny, you've only been here about ten minutes. Come and sit on the floor next to Susan.You like Susan. No, Susan, I don't think he wants to sit on your lap. No, I thought he didn't. Kenny! We don't want to see your tongue, thank you. No, not even a little bit of it. Put it back please. All of it. And give your jacket to Caroline, I'm sure she'll hang it up for you. Thank you, Caroline. Who is that whistling? Sidney, you know we never whistle indoors. You can whistle in the garden, but we never whistle indoors. Yes, I know you have just whistled indoors, but don't do it any more. And don't punch Jacqueline. I'm sure she didn't say she liked you punching her, did you Jacqueline? Well, I don't think it's a good idea, so we won't have any more punching. He is rather a disruptive element in our midst, Miss Roulting, but he does try to belong more than he used to, so we are encouraged, bless his heart. Let's be kind to each other today, shall we? We are going to learn some more of the Drum Marching Song we began yesterday. Who remembers how it starts? No, David, it doesn't begin 'Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star'. That's another song. Yes, I know you know it, but we aren't going to sing it now No. Not today. And not tomorrow I don't know when. We are going to sing our Drum Marching Song now. Edgar and Neville, why are you standing on those chairs? You can see into the fish-tank perfectly well from the floor. Get down, please. No, Neville, you can't hold a fish in your hand. Because fishes don't like being held in people's hands. They don't like coming out of the water, you see. Their home is in the water. Well, they do have to come out of the water when we eat them, but these aren't eating fishes. These are friend fishes. It's Phyllis and Fred. We wouldn't want to eat Phyllis and Fred. No, Sidney, you wouldn't. I don't think they'd be better than sausages. Come back, please. You don't have to go and see Phyllis and Fred. You know them perfectly well. I don't know what they are doing behind the weeds, Sidney. Just having a friendly game, I expect. Neville, you tell us how the Drum Marching Song begins. Yes! That's right. 'Rum tum tum, says the big bass drum', Well remembered, Neville. When we know the song well we're going to march to the Drum Song. But today we'll just stand and sing it; so, everybody ready? 'Rum tum tum, says the big bass drum.' Just a minute, Miss Boulting. Where is your drum, Kenny? No, not on your head. It's in front, isn't it, on a make-believe string round your neck. Sidney, I heard what you said. You know it isn't 'Rum tum tummy'. It may be funnier, but it isn't right. Yes. it is a funny joke. Let's get the laughter over, please. Finished? Now then. Ready? Thank you, Miss Boultiflg. 'Rum tum tummy...' Yes, I made a mistake. It was silly, of me, wasn't it? Yes, very silly. Sh - sh -. It wasn't as silly as all that. I think we'll go on to the next bit perhaps... Miss Boulting... 'Rooti-toot-toot, says the... Who says 'Rooti-toot-toot', David? No, David, not 'Twinkle Twinkle'. Yes, Lavinia, the 'Cheerful Flute'. And what is a flute? No, Dicky, it isn't an orange. It isn't a banana. It isn't an apple. It isn't FRUIT, it's FLUTE. FLUTE. And what is a flute? Yes, Lavinia, it's in a band. It's a musical instrument in a band. And how do we play it? No, we don't kick it and bash it about, Sidney. Now think. We blow it. Yes, Edgar, we blow it, and the music comes out of it. It's a musical instrument, and we blow down it. Rachel, don't blow at Timmy. And Timmy, don't blow back. I'm sorry she blew you a very wet one. But don't blow a wet one back. Now use your hankies, and wipe each other down, both of you. I'm sure you're both sorry. No, Kenny, it isn't time to go home yet. Shirleen, why are you taking your skirt off? I'm sure Mummy wants you to keep it nice and clean, but you won't get it dirty from singing, you know. Yes, it is very pretty. Yes, and it's got little doggies all over it. Little blue and little pink doggies. Put it on again, please. Yes, your panties are pretty; and your vest. But pull down your skirt now. George. Remember what I asked you not to do? Well, then... Rooti-toot-toot, says the cheerful flute.' Rest. Sidney, you're whistling again. And if you are going to whistle you must learn to do it properly You don't just draw in your breath like that, you have to blow in and out. It's no good saying you bet I can't whistle, because I can. I've been able to whistle for a very long time, but I'm not going to do it now. But I can. I don't know why I compete with him, Miss Boulting. I really shouldn't. Let's start our Drum Marching Song from the very beginning, shall we? One, two... What did you say, Miss Boulting? Already! So it is. Oh, good. And here is Mrs Western with our milk and biscuits. Get into a nice straight line by the trolley, please. No, Kenny, it isn't time to go home yet. There is still an hour and a half to go...
The end